Redo: Friendship, Struggle, and The Only Way to Come Out on Top

Redo: Friendship, Struggle, and The Only Way to Come Out on Top

It’s not often our natural instinct to give someone a redo. After all, sometimes when we let someone try again it means they win, and we lose. This is just as true in our relationships as it is in a card game—but the stakes are even higher.  It’s far easier to cut someone out than to let her try to win back our trust again. It’s far easier to let a co-worker look bad for her poor planning than it is to help her out, knowing she’ll be the one taking all the credit.

Read More

5 Reasons Why Your Pastor is Burnt Out

5 Reasons Why Your Pastor is Burnt Out

1. You expect every single aspect of the church experience to be catered to your unique needs, taste, and preferences. Of course we all see the world, and our churches, from our unique perspective of taste, past experience, and desires. Yet a church is made up of all kinds of people, and is also poised to engage with those who haven’t even shown up yet. Your church isn’t, and should be, catered to YOU specifically—and when each of us has this expectation, it becomes impossible for a pastor to ‘win’ or make anyone happy. What’s the big deal, you say? The phrase “death by a thousand paper cuts” comes to mind.

Read More

Why I Don't Think We Need To "Be More Real" On Social Media

Why I Don't Think We Need To "Be More Real" On Social Media

I was broken up with a few years ago. The email came from a distant friend. It was a loose connection to begin with, but our friendship was officially terminated when she determined that when I posted photos of food and meals on Facebook it was with the intention of making her feel bad. I tried to explain that all of us feel weird sometimes when we view other people’s lives online—I tried to tell her that when I saw photos of her out to dinner with friends and sisters I cried because at that time I was painfully lonely. But that was that, and with a few clicks of the keyboard I was cut off. For good.

Read More

Stand Up // Speak Up

Stand Up // Speak Up

This is my mad face. I mean, my truly, for real, no joke, take a step back, mad face. 

It had started about a week or two before. I was sitting outside working on a coffee shop patio when a stranger approached me with a message, “the man behind you is pretending to use his phone but is really taking pictures of you.”...

Read More